This is a great story from writer Hadyn Jones, describing his daughter Marley:
“Marley is also teaching me about dealing with adversity. She’s trying to master walking at the moment, so her transport resembles a drunken stumble. If she falls, she doesn’t stay grounded wondering what went wrong, she’s quickly back into it. If she does hurt herself, she has a cry, takes a cuddle from the nearest parent and is then back into it. Her previous failures are quickly forgotten.
If I have a setback, I dwell on it for a good week, internalise my pain and cautiously start again. It’s as if I have forgotten the successes in my life and I spend my days trying to dodge the reminders of past failures.
I suspect it’s this thinking that is putting a hand brake on my life.”
Marley is demonstrating beautifully some key skills of resilience, bouncing back, acknowledging her emotions, making use of support from others and focusing on the challenge ahead.
What is your style at the moment? Do you view setbacks as temporary knockbacks and challenges to overcome, or take one as a sign to give up and be reminded of past failures to dwell on?
Experiment with taking a Marley approach to setbacks this week and see if this helps to strengthen your resilience.